Keep On Keeping On

Right now, I’m trying to knit some socks for the first time. It’s a steep learning curve. Note to the knitting community – you are not beginner-friendly and you seem to like it that way. I guess it makes you feel better to be in this exclusive knitting club that is too obscure and elite for regular people to ever hope to enter. I get it, because there are a lot of crafting communities like that, but I still don’t understand the mindset. Accessibility doesn’t diminish your own craft, so who does it hurt to share knowledge and nurture discovery? I hate how many “so easy for beginners!” patterns I have looked at that have no guidance or explanation whatsoever about the basics. It’s just so dumb to specifically market a project as being for ‘beginners’ but then leave out critical information that a beginner wouldn’t know. My latest problem has been that my pattern said I needed 2.25mm circular needles or double pointed needles – that was all it said. I bought said needles then realized that the cord was too long, so I bought shorter ones, and they are still too long. I am now waiting on a pair of needles from the UK that I’m assured are short enough for socks, but it would have been nice to have even the slightest bit of guidance on that to begin with. And my chances are dwindling of being able to knit Nathan a pair of fancy socks in time for Valentine’s Day. And I have the prettiest yarn lined up for the project (Nathan’s yarn is on the left, and there are two peachy ones for me on the right – yarns by Skein):

Aside from the endless frustration of (trying to and not) knitting, I have been cooking like mad. Last night was a chorizo and chicken paprika stew with rice, Greek yoghurt and spring onions. Later in the week, it will be red curry lentils, grilled salmon with couscous and green beans, Korean beef rice bowls with kimchi and bok choy. I’m feeling like the key to eating healthy is to be prepared – I have been writing out a meal plan a week in advance and having the ingredients on hand so I never get to that awful point where I have no ideas, no ingredients and I’m too hungry in that moment to make a good choice. We’ve already seen some changes in our bodies – encouraging, so far!

It has been an odd sort of month though. Not enough beach days, not enough fun of any sort. This season of life is all about persistence, little everyday efforts and keeping on going even when things are boring. And let’s face it: losing weight, learning to drive, decluttering – they are all so boring and it sucks sometimes to think ‘this is my life right now’. There are so many things I would rather be doing. But the reason for sticking with these things is that the reward is so big, and almost nothing wonderful ever comes easily. So it sucks, but it won’t suck as much soon.

Yes, driving. I haven’t talked about this much before because it’s embarrassing, but here I am – in my thirties without a driver’s license. The main reason is anxiety, but the root of the whole thing is that I never learned as a teenager, and when I left home, I lived one block from a train and another block from a tram and had no need for a car. But it’s becoming more and more vital that I get this done. For selfish reasons, like driving myself to yoga class or to the beach; for practical reasons, like being able to drop off the dry cleaning or drive Nathan to the airport bus terminal; for essential reasons, like being able to take P+R+C+P to the vet hospital in an emergency if Nathan’s in Canberra. I have started lessons with a new instructor who has been amazing so far – she’s so calm and has made me feel confident about driving in a way that no other instructor ever has. She challenges me but respects that I need to go at my own pace. I’m aiming to have my license by Easter, but any time before midyear would be wonderful.

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